I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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