Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Randomize
