drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
