This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
