I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i think my tv is drunk
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
