Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
