Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Swine flu. Run for my life!
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
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