How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize