am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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