Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
