I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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