So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
