The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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