So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Randomize
