was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
