I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
high people should be assigned attendants
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
