come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
