She's JV to your varsity
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You dont lie about slip and slides
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
