Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
