You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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