She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
