She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Drake has all the answers
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
