it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
