I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
