i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
