xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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