This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I am full of burrito and curiosity
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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