Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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