i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
