i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I didn't notice because vodka
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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