Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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