The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
