am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
