I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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