Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I just found a bag of teeth...
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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