You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
