either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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