sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
