When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
