Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
You were trust falling into bushes
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
