If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
