pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
