You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
