did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Randomize