He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
