There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
