even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
