Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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