so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
