i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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