the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I want to make a zoo with you.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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